You know how funny life can be? When I think I can't be more happy, something ruin my 'happy life' and here, I am writing because I can't believe how this life come in sometimes.
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For the past weeks I have been lucky enough to feel the 'it' feeling; the feeling when you feel that nothing bad can happen... that you fell so grateful, loved... simply happiness is in the air. But today, I face something that make me cry, that push me to call my mum (cause she is the one I want to hear the sound right now, not to mention she is the one who can calm me down in my lowest point). Something that I hate to admit that I can't handle, something that I like to pretend that I am strong. why should pretend?
Because that's how it works. If your not happy, pretend you are until you really feel. That's what I am trying to do with this strong thingy.
Well actually I feel that I am quite strong. But you know, sometimes I just can't believe why some people can be so mean to others. Why some people seems like trying to make others feel down? Get over it people. There's a big difference between advice, critics and something bullshit out of your mouth. Critic is just critic as long as you treat it like it is. But if you exaggerating it and add something that has no sense at all, you know I won't care. And I don't have to, because it's meaningless.
Some people maybe didn't happy with their life. Oh, they won't admit it, of course. But you see in the way they treat others. Like they are perfect, but actually it is themselves that need to be fixed. You see in the way they are talking, hurtful. And they don't have much friends, people can't stand them.
After talked with my mum minutes ago, I feel pretty much better. My anger disappeared and I am starting feel sorry for the bullies. I should be feel thankful because there's always people in my side when I was down, instead of using others to transfer anger and dissatisfaction cause of my own life and problem and own mistake.
I remember when I was little, I have a friend who used to pull my hair.
That time, I had a long black hair, and sometimes my Mom braided it.
Whenever I came home crying because of what she had done, my Mom will
told me to be strong. Sometimes she told me to do it back to her since
she didn't seem to stop even she knew it hurts me. So the next time she
did, I would forbear myself and pulled her hair back. But then she will pulled it even harder, and I will back home crying again...
You know, that little bullies was having a short curly hair...Got the point? After all, haters will always be haters. Even sometimes it seems there is no way for you, don't let them taking control on you. Just keep trying and hold yourself harder... and ask God to help you :)
Thank's Mom, for always be there... and thank's God for remind me that, afterall, life is just life. No more :)
And for the bullies... I'll be stronger, watch out, yo chicken > :)
Laa Ilaaha Illaa Anta Subhaanaka Innii Kuntu Minazh Zhaalimiin
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